Today I turn 20. Well… to be more precise I turn 20 at 11:15 pm tonight which actually means my birthday is only 45 minutes on the 24th of June every year.
I don’t feel any different. When I was younger I used to think that going into 20, I’d have my whole life together and that the moment I turn 20, I start to “age” into a real adult, I don’t know, sort of like metamorphosis or something.
But this is far from the truth as you know. With that said though, I’d like to think I have matured in some aspects of my character such as, how I view the world with my opinions on certain topics and mindset taking a dramatic turn to what I used to believe in.
For instance, growing up I’ve always thought that presents really define occasions like birthdays and holidays and that without them, it wouldn’t be a “real” birthday or a “real” Christmas. It sounds so materialistic, superficial and perhaps even childish but I admit that it was my mindset growing up. I’m glad that over the past couple of years, I’ve changed this way of thinking and started to become more grateful and mindful of what I have, grateful for the company rather than goods I receive from people.
Shifting to this way of thinking, for me, has made me happier. I don’t feel relatively deprived or treated unfairly because I didn’t get the latest, expensive makeup gift set from my boyfriend. I know living in this distorted media-led society, people may measure love and care from gifts alone and it’s easy to fall into the trap – I have myself.
For the past couple of years, I’ve decided to “ditch” the idea of expecting gifts from people on my birthday or Christmas and instead, focus on the greetings, the phone calls, the messages to meet-up and appreciate more, give more rather than expect more.
My change in mindset has notably changed as I gradually moved up to Level 20 of my life.
The most frequently asked question on the topic of birthdays is (for me at least, especially from my colleagues at work): “What have you got planned? Are ya doing anything nice?”
Earlier this month, I booked my first appointment at the blood donation centre to this date. Those who have grown up with my through my blogs or at school, know that I. Hate. Needles.
Those jab injections at school? Kept moving to the end of the line as I got closer to the front. Doctor’s need to give me an injection? Please knock me out first or get someone to perform hypnosis on me or something.
So it was a big deal to me having this fear of injection and all but I went for it with unwavering motivations:
Unfortunately, I woke this morning with a cold and sore throat. Those familiar with the donation of blood process, you’re not allowed to donate if you have either of these. I was in denial and disappointed when I woke up because of my cold
and the EU referendum results but I have rescheduled next week so, the birthday gift to myself has to wait another week. I’m super excited for it!
I had such a lovely day nonetheless being surrounded by family, friends and of course, my boyfriend (oh and awesome food!)
I’m excited for the year ahead being 20, I aim to continue being inspired, positive and enthusiastic but also become more mindful and grateful for the little things!